Torn

As with every good problem, there are constraints that must be obeyed. The events in question will take place in the same state, which is far enough away from my home that I can only afford to go one time.

My question is, which option would you choose?

Option #1 is in early November. I would stay with my college roommate and finally get to meet a longtime net friend who will be in-state for only a short period of time. The longtime net friend and I have never managed to meet in person; he normally lives on the opposite side of the continent from me and the fact that he will be in this part of the country is an extremely unusual (albeit not a one-time-only) event.

Option #2 is later in November. I would, again, stay with my college roommate. My favorite band from college, which broke up five years ago, will be reuniting for a one-night-only concert—coincidentally enough, in the town where my ex-roommate lives. After they broke up, I expected never to see them play together…again. Ever. This appears to be a once-in-a-lifetime event.

The longtime net friend will have gone back across the continent before the date of the concert. The trips cannot be combined, and I really can only afford to go out there one time.

I ask two things of you. One - what would you do? Two - be kind in your responses. Both people - the college roommate and longtime net friend - read this site, and only found out a few minutes ago that this problem exists. They are both people I care about very much, and I have no choice; I must disappoint one of them.

So, c'mon, my three readers, step up to the plate and take your best shot. I'm open to good advice at this point, because I'm having trouble getting past saying "I don't want to make a decision on this."

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Comments

Well, it's rough. But I'd go to the concert and bring a tape recorder with me. (and ask for a board feed!) Because I am such a sucker for live music. And then I'd start saving up for a trip to visit longtime net friend. But I suppose it really depends on the friend. Of course, if you could find someone that you absolutely could depend on to tape the concert for you... it wouldn't be the same, but that might be a workable option.

Toss a coin?

Well, I hate to say "me too," but I like John's idea. You can visit your friend at another time, but the band may be a one-time deal. Of course, you could always visit earlier in the month, then send the roommate to the concert with instructions to get you a tape. Sorry - I think I may have just made things harder.

Honestly I'd so go with the net friend. I have so many people that I'd go meet if I had the chance but I most likely never will. As much as I love music I can get a dose of it whenever I want by just tossing in a CD. I know live is better but...I don't think its THAT much better

Well, ultimately, I think it really depends on how much you'll remember this particular event. If you're the kind of person who will remember this concert for years and years, and you think you simply won't be able to get the same amount of joy from a CD, go to the concert. On the other hand, if the concert will only be a happy, but not incredibly happy, memory for you a few years (or months) down the line, go see the friend. Chances are, you'll get much more out of the meals you'll share, the board games that you'll play, and the conversations you'll have. Hope this helps.

Bands come and go. Friends are not as fickle.

That the concert is a one-time-only almost swayed me ... still think you should go early in the month. :)

I'd do the concert & visit the friend as soon as possible later - which would mean a cool trip to a different part of the country. Of course since I just got back from being in the San Francisco area for 5 days with Net friends, most of whom I hadn't seen in person in 2 years, I'm all for the visiting different parts of the country.