Summertime stupids

Some recent finds from the joys of the interweb:

#1: What Planet Is This?

From this article from the Sun-Sentinel (italics are mine):

Mark and Lisa Hiryak, of Stuttgart, Ark., who were vacationing here, said the mixture of sun and clouds make South Florida's beaches more appealing.

"I've heard South Florida's sun is different because you can't get burned from it," said Lisa Hiryak, although her nose was turning red from a few minutes of afternoon sun.

I think I speak for all fair-skinned redheads in this world when I say: As soon as there's sunlight that you can't get burned from, I'm moving there, buying beachfront property, and learning how to sunbathe. Until then, it's SPF 3000 and parasols for me.

#2: I Know This Planet; I'm A Resident

From the 'current weather' blurb on

Mired in the atmospheric equivalent of boiling mud
Most of the South will remain mired in the atmospheric equivalent of boiling mud tomorrow as the usual afternoon thunderstorms bubble to life in the semi-permanent summertime glop pooled over the region.

'Taint summertime in the South unless the air's thick enough to swim in. Maybe that explains the summertime stupids we all get around here.


Yeah, and that mud is hell to breathe, especially when you're still getting over a June chest cold. Dammit.