Taking no chances here...
This may be overkill, but here's a way to be absolutely certain that my wishes are honored. This morning, I initiated paperwork to arrange for Brian Richardson to have medical, legal, and financial power of attorney in case I am incapacitated. Suzan Richardson will be his alternate (though my expectation is that they would make decisions together).
I hope it never comes to pass. I hope that within a year's time I can draw up a much simpler form that says Jeff has power of attorney, and Brian and Suzan are alternates, but right now I need to make sure someone has the ability to act for me if I cannot.
Worth noting: even if you are married, there are certain things your spouse cannot do if s/he doesn't have power of attorney. Don't think that a marriage contract is enough; it isn't.