Amazing. About a week before Christmas, suddenly the suburban population of Huntsville wakes up and says, collectively, "Holy shit, Christmas is next weekend? Why didn't anyone tell me?" (wailing and gnashing of teeth) "But I have to buy presents!"End result: hideous traffic backups up and down University. Don't even think about getting in the lane closest to the mall; you'll spend an extra thirty minutes just sitting there waiting for the cell-phone-yapping suburban "I Bought This SUV Six Months Ago And I Still Don't Know How To Park It" mommies to turn into the mall so they can snipe for the Perfect Gift.

Due to these people, the trip that should have taken me ten, maybe fifteen, minutes to get to today's Group Lunch took me thirty, thus making me late.

I was highly disgruntled.

The only way this scenario would make sense would be if, on New Year's Day, the memories of Christmas were erased from our collective consciousness, and only returned in mid-December. Why, people? Why the hell do you languish about for nearly twelve months then go on screaming madcap shopping sprees in the final week before Christmas?

Hate to break it to you, people, but the stores aren't breaking out new merchandise just for you, and with a few rare exceptions (not enough to justify traffic congestion) the 'sales' are rarely really worth anything.

So why don't you get off the bloody road and let those of us who actually need to buy a carton of milk actually get within shouting distance of a store?

This is why, unless I know the perfect gift ahead of time, I buy gift certificates.

* * * * *

While I'm at it, and got my rant on … I want a cluestick for Christmas. Not a little measly cluestick. I'm talking big, honking, nails-protruding-from-the-end cluestick, maybe with a hidden machete and plenty of heft toward the far end so that it'll really hurt when I swing it.

I've got some fan nazis that need to meet it.

Let me make a principle brutally clear: yes, it is good to sweat when you exercise. It indicates that you are likely pushing your body hard enough to be reaping actual cardiac benefit from the work you are doing. However, sweating is a deceptive and temporary loss of weight. Let me spell that out in clearer terms in case the gym princesses in the back didn't hear me when I yelled the first time:

IF IN-EXERCISE SWEATING WAS REAL WEIGHT LOSS, WE'D USE SAUNAS, NOT EXERCISE, TO LOSE WEIGHT.

Let's think about this, people! Has your desperation to drop weight clouded your judgment? (Ok, so that was a rhetorical question.) Sure, you do technically drop weight when you sweat, because your body is oozing liquid in an attempt to use evaporative cooling to lower your exercise-heightened body temperature.

But guess what you have to do after your workout? That's right. Replace the lost liquid.

Technically, cutting off everything above your neck would constitute as weight loss, because you would be removing mass from your body. That doesn't mean it makes even the slightest lick of sense in the long run, though.

(Sigh.)

The plan for the time being is to do my gym workouts on the early end of the available time in my daily routine, to avoid the people who scream bloody murder for my wanting a fan on. I had to do a workout last night with no fans at all, and I came home with my clothes absolutely drenched and a burgeoning headache. What a surprise: today's with-fan workout resulted in me needing half the water of yesterday's workout, and I wasn't utterly exhausted afterwards.

Funny how that works.

* * * * *

Thanks to Brad I'm now poking around with AudioScrobbler. I'm looking at replacing DoSomething, which is kinda clunky and has issues, with output from this plugin instead. I'm intrigued by idea of learning more about my listening trends over time, and using that info to help me find more new artists that I might like.

Once my stats are anywhere near interesting, I'll post a link. (The industrious among you will figure it out, I suspect.) For now, though, I'm consciously seeding AS with songs I like. A foundation, of sorts. Given another day or two, I'll return to my regular playlisting.

* * * * *

I am also working on one of the niftiest knitting projects I have ever attempted. Those at the Locals Lunch today saw the beginnings of it. Once I've completed another iteration of the pattern, I'll likely show the first photos. It's the best combination of knitting and sheer geekery that I've yet achieved.

That's all. Go to bed.