There's a special place in hell for people like us. In this case, 'Chris' is Mr. Lanphear of retrospecticus.org non-fame.

First, I must extend thanks and gratitude to Megan of rapunzellstower.com and Kyle of fidgeting.net, whose seemingly-unrelated bug reports, two months apart, provided the solution to an ugly Quarto bug I had repeatedly glimpsed but been unable to personally reproduce.

Silly domesticat. (Most of my bug reports start like that.) Two months of off-and-on hunting for this bug, which consisted of seven characters in one file being misplaced. Which ones, you ask?

Oh, the closing FORM tag.

Hi all -

Currently deeply ensconced in explaining to XML and PHP how they will behave as I ask. XML unimpressed, PHP merely amused. Rumors galloping about of XML squiring cheap tart PHP to New Orleans for a weekend of serious debauchery, leaving the stolid marrieds here in Huntsvega$ alone to find ways to make new code work.

Have tried to explain to the cheap tart, with little avail, that I simply cannot release the next version of wonderPortal until she and her bawdy compatriot decide to cooperate with me, and that their noncompliance is leading to much frustration on my part.

(What is the game of 'seven words'? See this entry for explanations, or to contribute potential words.)

They resist sticks, stones, brandished bones, and - in the earliest of hours when no one is looking - abject pleading and begging. They, the disenchanted teenage brood, resent that it was I - silly, bumbling fool, I - who brought them into existence, and blame me for all their problems.They hurl insults when angered. Technical terms are spat like curse words through the browser, because they know I feel the sting.

It has been seven days since the Battle For Manage-Pings began in northeast Alabama, and I must report that the carnage has been intense. Burned dinners. Insomnia. Ignored cats. Friends who resort to emails in the hopes of actually making contact with my brain.

Dear CMS writers:

I think I hate all of you. Including me. Will you take it personally if I take your code and fling it against the nearest wall, screaming and cursing, until your code either a) bleeds or b) apologizes and fixes itself? It would really make me feel better if I could just do that and get it out of my system.

I've been promising this script to friends for a long, long time, and when I went on vacation, I finally got a chance to sit down and write it.

My friends and I syndicate our content on wondergeeks.net, but we've never been entirely happy with the results. We're scattered all over the globe - from the UK to Hawaii - and it's difficult to keep up with multiple blogs marked in multiple timezones. Tuesday in England doesn't necessarily equate to Tuesday in Hawaii.