Hi all -

Currently deeply ensconced in explaining to XML and PHP how they will behave as I ask. XML unimpressed, PHP merely amused. Rumors galloping about of XML squiring cheap tart PHP to New Orleans for a weekend of serious debauchery, leaving the stolid marrieds here in Huntsvega$ alone to find ways to make new code work.

Have tried to explain to the cheap tart, with little avail, that I simply cannot release the next version of wonderPortal until she and her bawdy compatriot decide to cooperate with me, and that their noncompliance is leading to much frustration on my part.

Cats are threatening feline mutiny if ratio of scritchies/day are not immediately increased fivefold. Mumbles coming from Edmund about sucking my breath out while I sleep.

Suspect that things might get better tomorrow, but am not sure. May have to chain PHP to desk to keep her from bolting to New Orleans. Have no desire to spend my weekend dealing with these issues.

Signing off to inflict severe bodily harm on cheap tart - flighty wench too, if I can catch her. In the meantime, discuss amongst yourselves. Most of you will see this on a Friday morning. Amuse yourselves.

Have lovely weekend. Anyone interested in helping debug pesky XML/PHP code could perhaps email me. Don't let the bitches leave.