Perhaps the three-thousandth iteration of this lesson will be the one that sticks: "Amy, you have to keep your calorie count up around 1600 or you will not be able to do your workouts." But who are we kidding? Right now I'm terribly repentant; I know I haven't eaten enough in the past couple of days, and I'm currently promising myself that I'll be more careful about what I eat and make sure that I get enough calories to get me through each day.

It's either going to be the laughter, the narcoleptic dog, or the broken toilet cover. I don't know which, but I'm leaning toward making it all three. I didn't know her well, but somehow, I think she'd find the combination appropriate.Her name was Duffie. I met her once.

The progression was thus: Jeff invoked spousal rights, thus ensuring I went to his ten-year high school reunion, which I was absolutely certain I would hate. As luck, fate, and reunions would have it, we sat at the table with Samantha, one of Jeff's closer high school friends. As we sat at the back table, merrily snarking our way through the dinner, Jeff and Samantha flipped through the pages of the book to find out what had happened to everyone else.