oh God oh God oh God I thought she wasn't ever coming back! Tenzing kept saying she wasn't ever coming back and I kept telling him that she would, but the sun kept coming up and she wasn't ever there to feed us in the morning and I was starting to worry that maybe Tenzing was right.He's the smarter kittybrother, after all.

To the humans reading this missive, We send casually-meowed greetings and salutations. We recognize that the visitors to Our domicile wish to receive only the best of care from Our humans for the duration of their stay, and We are pleased to announce the results of Our ongoing quality-check program.

Prior to all guest arrivals, We thoroughly investigate the sheet situation of all guest beds in order to assure our guests a 100% mouse-free experience. We simply will not tolerate even the merest whisper of a hint that We might inflict any but the best of mouse-free experiences on Our tolera….uhhhh, beloved guests.

(We'd stand behind the guarantee…but that'd mean We'd have to wake up.)

Click on the following photo to see a demonstration of Our quality-control procedures at work:

Tenzing is growing hungry, and is very unlikable right now. He has begun to pace and yowl. I think he needs attention. I tried grooming him, but he bit me on the ass. I guess that means he doesn't want to be groomed.I think he's missing the Crunchy Food we usually get every day. He went outside to hunt. Either he is dumber than I originally thought, or the mice are much smarter. The toy-on-a-stick always plays along when we want to hunt; why don't the mice? I'm very confused.

Hunting vastly overrated. Silly mouse didn't stand still and let me stalk it. Mouse does not appear to understand rules of the game:

Edmund is weak. He wants his mommycat. He is becoming whiny. Perhaps I should treat him as he treats me - a nice, brotherly bite on the butt to remind him who is boss.Loud banging noises coming from closets. The female one is especially unhappy. She is yelling promises of food and treats to Edmund, who is dangerously close to giving in. He doesn't seem to understand that we are predators, capable of hunting and killing our own food with nothing more than our wits and our delicately-taloned paws.

After a good deal of effort, we managed to open one of the windows. (Again, many things are difficult without opposable thumbs.) Tenzing remembered how he leaned into the window screen and made it fall off, so I talked him into doing it again.We sniffed the front porch very, very carefully. There were many things that needed examining. More tasty bugs - which we ate - and a couple more spiders - which we didn't.

We wish the female one still grew catnip for us. We miss fresh catnip.